“Every good relationship, especially marriage, is based on respect. If it’s not based on respect, nothing that appears to be good will last very long.” – Amy grant .
“Marriage ,indeed, is based on respect. In fact all relationships are based on mutual trust & respect, ” said my Granny. She always insisted on simplifying life . . Most of the time it’s not a situation that’s complicated but our perception & reactions that make it complicated.
Her life mantra was simple ” Think simple, see simple & act simply“.
Like any other relationship, marriage has its share of highs & lows. The key of a successful marriage is to deal with ‘lows’ & not get carried away in ‘highs’ . Marriage is a liaison between two adults who come from different background. To anticipate a complete harmony is a tall order. Both partners have preconceived notions about other. When the reality strikes, it often become hard to come in terms with the reality. The problem arises when we try to evaluate other as per our set rules.
My Grandmother, in her journal, mentioned four simple steps to a successful married life. Let’s hear them ..I should call it A B C D of marriage ….what say :)
1. Acceptance : – First & foremost, accept. Accept the other person the way he/ she is, whether far from your imagination or a dream come true. The fact remains that this is what you have to deal with for the rest of your life. You do it with love, understanding, compassion or anger, frustration & ignorance, is up to you. As soon as you are going to accept your circumstances, sooner you would be in control. You would think radically & act accordingly.
2. Balance : – Try And strike a balance between your previous life & married life. Your previous life consists of your job, friends, family & most importantly yourself. In an attempt to adjust to your new lifestyle don’t lose out on existing factors, you will regret it later. Remember an unhappy person, no matter how much he/she tries, can not make anyone happy. Marriage is an integral ‘part ‘ of your life NOT your whole life.
3.Commitment: – In marriage, you don’t just commit to one person but to everything in his/her life. Likes -dislikes, Faith, Family, Friends, Fears, Dreams, faults, flaws, every nook N corner of other’s life. Put your faith in the relationship, invest your time, keep patience & enjoy your beautiful journey together.
4. Determination: – You have to work on your marriage every single day. It is sheer hard work & determination. Lifestyle changes that come after marriage are neither easy for the girl nor for the boy. The crisis shouldn’t be driving you around the bend. Converse, open up, share with each other. Be determined to make every moment of your married life a happy one.
Marriage is not a competition or battle that you must win at any cost. Nobody leads or follows. It belongs to both the partner equally. Both contribute equally to make it a success. Never belittle the one who is not earning bucks, money alone can’t run a house. It takes a lot of love, compassion, understanding & constant hard work to make a house, A HOME…
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