Motherhood, a word so strong that evokes a flood of emotions in every single soul. The joy of being a mother is incomparable. When your little ones come running towards you & give you a tight hug, all your worries, tensions, tiredness melt away in their warm embrace. Once you are a mother you wake, sleep, breath, live for your babies. It is natural. As enchanting it may sound, motherhood is not a simple job. We all make mistakes that reflect badly on our child. Here are 5 parenting mistakes to avoid.
1. Setting the standard too high: A lot has been written & said on the subject. New mothers keep getting parenting tips from family members, friends, neighbours & sometimes even a stranger you meet in a bus happily give a tip or two on parenting. With such a tremendous pressure to be a perfect mother we often set our standards so high that at times it becomes practically impossible to fulfil the expectations. We want nothing but the best for our kids.Their health, education, daily routine, likes, dislikes become our priority.
But I think keeping our approach practical is important. Be it is our method of parenting or as expectations from our child. It is always better to know our strength & play to it. Similarly, our expectation from our child should be under check. Each & every child is different. No matter how much we try to make them an all-rounder, they will shine in the way that comes naturally to them.
2. Forgetting our own lives: Let’s just sit for a while, & think about our day. what have you done for yourself today ??? Let’s do not include your monthly salon visit in this discussion. Talk about a regular day. Did u write the poetry that’s stuck in your mind since last many days? Or did u read the magazine since its been delivered, danced on your favourite song, soaked your tired feet in fragrant oil you purchased from the supermarket last month, listened to your favourite music with the peaceful mind. The answer may be a yes, no or I shall do it first thing tomorrow. But we know it will be kept on the back burner once the chaotic morning drill starts.
Mind you, until & unless you are happy with yourself, you won’t be able to make others happy. Don’t let yourself be lost in the melee. You are not just a daughter, daughter-in-law, wife & mother. You are a woman first. A person who has her own dreams, desires & interest. Save a little time for yourself. At first, it will be difficult. But once you will firmly practice it, you & people who are dependent on you will understand the important of your ‘ME’ time. Love Yourself!
3.One Style Fit All: This is probably the worst parenting mistake we usually make. We apply the same magic formula to bring up ur kids forgetting that they all have different personalities, likings & capabilities. You can’t possibly apply the same method of parenting to all your children. kids behave differently under even under same conditions. You can teach the kids how to do a thing, but it is up to them to replicate or bring in their own style.
Do not compare you kids with other kids or even with their siblings. Help them retain their individuality. Teach them to soar high while analyzing their abilities & limitations.
4. Blaming yourself for everything that went wrong: Admit it, you take all the responsibilities of everything that goes wrong in your house. If your kid is not eating well, your responsibility, if he is not scoring good marks, your fault if he is not behaving properly, your failure. Come on guys, why it always you. Kid fall sick, all fingers are pointed towards mother.You are instantly filled with guilt & get in the damage control mode. Stop whatever little you have been doing for yourself. You literally become your kid’s shadow. Until & unless some other person among family or friends certifies you as a good mother, you can’t stop panicking.
We don’t trust our won instants. We need certification from others that we are taking good care of our family. You won;t stop until your family or friends certify you as a good mother. Please realize that things go wrong, every day, everywhere. You can’t possibly be present everywhere & make everything right. Don’t blame yourself.
5. Take it easy & enjoy parenting: Take it easy.Being a mother is not some sort of an exam that you need to score high, or some battle where if you blink you lose out to your enemy.It’s the most beautiful bond between two individual.Live its beauty, feel it’s magic, soak in its warmth. Don’t make it a matter of life & death, or prestige, or competition. Don’t spread yourself too thin. Love your child, take care of her/him. But don’t forget yourself. You can’t & shouldn’t try to attain perfection.
Make mistakes, its human. Don’t Forget, God Makes Mistakes too. Happy Parenting :)
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