A letter from a mother to her gay child showing her unconditional love, support & care. Homosexuality is not a crime.It’s high time we understand this.
My dearest, my child
I know it must have taken the immense amount of courage for you to come out & declare who you are? I can very well understand the emotional turmoil you must have faced all this time. You must be thinking how I would react? What your dad would say? Will our relatives, friends, neighbors or anyone that matter to us accept you? Let me tell you my dearest I am always with you no matter what.
Coming out & accepting
I am fortunate to have a child like you who had the courage to accept his orientation & shared it with us. I can well imagine how confused you must have been when you found out that you were different from others. It must have been devastation, frustration & confusing. I wish you talked with me that very day. My dear, there is absolutely nothing to feel ashamed or embarrassed about. Do you know, when a child attains puberty he/she goes through a similar confusing state. For you it was more complicated as you must have realized that you were different from other children of your age.
Was it shocking for me? I would be lying if I say I was not fluttered for a moment. Not because of your truth but because of the fact that I didn’t know such an important aspect of child’s life.I, as a parent, should have been more proactive & forthcoming. I shouldn’t have brushed off the changes I sensed in your behavior as the usual transition. You too could have come to me at any time & shared your dilemmas. We always encouraged our kids to communicate.
Is it something wrong?
Absolutely not! It is as natural as being a man or a woman, being tall or short, brown skinned or white skinned, or being straight for that matter. It is who you are. It’s a part of your personality, part of your being. This is the way the Creator has made you. And, believe me, none of his creation is bad, disgraceful, sinful or wrong.
Mind you homosexuality is not a problem, disease, acquired trait or result of bad karma. People who think or believe such things need to break their cocoons & spread their wings. So don’t ever fall in the trap of people who make you think otherwise. You are who you are, nothing wrong in it!
How is this society going to react?
Don’t talk about homosexuality, it’s a sin! This is the reaction of most of the people in our society. Although, I have heard women in my kitty party discussing gay & lesbian as a hot gossip. Some treat it as a dreadful disease while others consider themselves ‘immune’ to it considering their ‘sanskari’ upbringing. I pity them. In spite of being literate how ignorant they are.
Homosexuality has existed from the time immemorial. There are references in our historical scriptures. It’s neither a western concept nor alien to Indians. We, the so called modern people, tend to ignore the facts & live in denial. We can’t change the society, but we can definitely learn to cope up with the pressure & lead our lives.
Your relationship & future
After this revelation, you might lose some friends. That’s OK. At least you will know who your real friends are. Or are they your friends at all? At the end of this mayhem, you will be left with people who really care for you, who accept you as you are without being judgmental, without trying to change you or influence you. They will be your real friends. Keep them, treasure them forever.
A relationship between two individual is their personal affair. You will have your share of heartaches & breaks. But never ever let it dominate your whole life. Always truth your instincts. Respect your partner & command respect.
If you ever feel lost, need a person to speak to or a shoulder to lean on, just remember your mother is still there for you. I have never discriminated among my kids on the basis of their genders, I shall not do it now on the basis of their orientation. Whenever you feel lonely just look back, I will be standing right behind you, supporting you to best of my capabilities. You are & shall remain my dearest child.
Your proud mother.
This post is a part of Indispire Edition 72
(Disclaimer: Homosexuality is not yet accepted in our society. Gay, Lesbians & transgenders are still fighting for their rights & their very survival. I request all my readers to be civil & considerate while commenting on this serious issue. This is the least we can do. Any derogatory, distasteful or hurtful comment will be immediately deleted. )