A fellow blogger , who seems to be an avid reader of my blog or so I presume , pointed out that I detest men . He said most of my blog posts talk about crime against women .And I hardly write about atrocities faced by men. I usually don’t procrastinate , this one seeped deepinto my conscious .I have been thinking for few days . Was he right ? Am I being biased towards my gender ? Have I hopped on the male bashing band wagon ? AM I A MISANDRIST ?
I wanted to find out the answers , not for the gentleman I wanted to explore my own truth . The best way to unravel the hidden was to ask myself few questions & answer as honestly as possible .
What do I think of men ?
Men for me are just human beings who are different from me physically , biologically & psychologically .This is the way we have been designed & created . We just have different approach to individual circumstances . Is that wrong ? I don’t think so .That the way we are meant to be .
Do they threaten me ( or existence of the female tribe ) ?
No , not at all . Since the day God created mankind we have co existed . We are a part of the greater cause , Creating life . Culture , society , social norms , status , biases et al have come much later . The whole survival drama is basically to bring two individual together so that they reproduce .And the wheel of life moves on . Earlier when we were living in caves & eating raw meat , even at that time men went out to hunt & women stayed back to look after the ‘home’ & kids . Was that deliberate ? NO we picked roles best suited to our nature & psych . No one threatened any one or ruled over . It was an arrangement . A mutual arrangement !
Do I cherish relationships with men in my life ?
Of course ! I have wonderful relationships with males in my life . Be it be my father , brother , husband , son , friends or colleagues. I have had them in my life all along . In fact they have been instrumental in developing my personality. I learnt a lot from them . They have always been respectful towards me . I look up to them & share a great rapport.
So where does the problem starts ? Gender war ( for the name sake ) ?
Problem between the two gender starts when
- A woman is treated differently solely on the basis of her gender . Is that a criteria ? Holy-books says NO ! Majority believe so.
- A woman is touched without her permission . She has a right over her body , as a man has right over his manhood . Would any man like to be groped ? Than why do it with women ?
- A woman is not considered at par with her male counter part .
- A woman is considered an asset , liability , property or an object .
- A woman is forced to obey without having a say . If th divine power wanted her to be mute , he/she would have made her so . She is given all senses similar to man which clearly means she has equal rights .
Does that make every man a sinner , a praying animal .NO . If you don’t do the above mentioned than you are off the grid .
How are men suppose to treat women ?
Answer is pretty simple ” treat them as the way you want to be treated “. In my personal opinion the top 10 things that can stabilize any relationship ARE
Everything else comes after that . Love , care , protection , warmth & everything else loses its meaning if you are not respectful towards the other individual. It applies to one & all.
Women alone are not facing atrocities ,men are also being subjected to them . When a man himself has so many problems to deal with in his life ,why make the life of the other individual difficult ?
Not every woman is righteous , not every man a sinner . We all have our flaws .We all make mistakes . Only problem is women are victimized more thanks to age old social norms . The urge to dominate has taken over the basic human instinct , that is to care & love . Why dominate any one ? Why control anyone’s life choices ? If you are concerned , guide & suggest .Don’t impose .
No one hates any one . We are all fighting for our survival. The game of attack & counter attack would continue till eternity if we don’t stop it now . Agreed there is no such thing as perpetual love but at least not make it ‘survival of the fittest ‘ . We can’t survive without each other . Why not just peacefully coexist !!
[ P.s – Back to the original questions ‘Do I hate men ‘ ? Hell no . In fact I Hate to Hate them ;) ]